POINT OF MY LIFE
At the age of twelve, I experienced the worst earthquake one
in my life in İstanbul.Never had I thought that I would see such a notorious catastrophe one day.I had never been in such a big disaster that effected the people so deeply.It was as if your life got darker and darker. Furthermore ,the earthquake taught me that life is unpredictable and life should be cherished intensely.
It was an ordinary day and woke up early to meet with Tayfun.I dressed up
and prepared to go out.While I was on bus the weather started to get dark.I was feeling
the storm was comıng by lookıng at the sky.AS Soon as I arrıved the cafe and sat on the chaır wıth Tayfun.I felt that the floor was shakıng slowly.We thougt that it was only a tremor that would soon end.
Before I had felt many tremors but that one was different fear in my life.The tremors so strong that we felt the ground yawned.We could not move anywhere an the escape was impossible in our condition.The people got shocked in the cafe….It was chaos. Everybody was trying to escape and either us.I stopped and thought a second “Is this really end of my lİfe?”
Fortunately , Tayfun caught me and we got outjust at that time the cafe was destroyed.It was a miracle because we were still alive.I could not belıeve my eyes when I saw the destoyed building .All of the city was razed and many peope died.It was the most strongest earthquake ın my lıfe that I have never forgotten.When I remember this event I can not stop crying.Being together with our loved ones and stil being alive are the most pleasure in my life…
İLKAY AYILMAZ DÖNDÜ AVCI
TAFUN ATMAZ SELDA BACAK
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ReplyDeletehi friends
ReplyDeleteour grade is 85.
Creativity:20 it is creative, but you can write more detaily.
language:15there are some grammatical mistakes and vocabulary mistakes.we think 'tremor'is wrong.tremor means a trembling; a shivering or shaking;as, the tremor of a person who is weak, infirm, or old.
Cohesion/Coherence= 25
Overall impression =25 we like your story